Mega-Millions Sci-Fi Epic With Tons Of Stars Plays Like An Amateur Made It


By Robert Scucci
| Published

Cinematic passion projects often share a number of through lines that are to be expected in the form of up-and-coming actors with no star power, a budget tighter than a violin string that’s ready to snap the second it’s put under too much pressure, and the unfortunate lack of studio backing that most established filmmakers have access to after proving themselves over time. Francis Ford Coppola’s most recent outing, the $136 million Megalopolis, changed the game by proving how a roster full of A-list actors and seemingly infinite financial resources generated by Coppola’s own personal wealth can’t save a film that was clearly doomed from the start. 

After sitting down and watching the 138-minute dystopian science-fiction epic myself, a new through line has been added to my personal headcanon for passion projects: unchecked ego. 

That is to say, it’s not a massive stretch to compare Megalopolis’ themes and execution to ego-driven projects led by Tommy Wiseau or Neil Breen, two self-proclaimed auteurs who personally finance their own projects and have very little pushback against their respective unwavering, unhinged, creative visions.

Money Talks

In order to self-finance Megalopolis, Francis Ford Coppola sold his Sonoma County wineries to Delicato Family Wines for an intimidating equity deal to the tune of $650 million dollars, earmarking $200 million from the deal to pursue the artistic vision he had been trying to fully realize for 40 years. With the fortune he amassed, Coppola was finally primed to produce his passion project without any studio interference.

Star Power Only Works If The Screenplay Makes Sense 

megalopolis

With a high-caliber budget comes high-caliber talent, and there is no shortage of A-listers featured in Megalopolis. While it’s easy to place blame on B-movies (or Megalopolis, which I’m calling a high-budget B-movie) for having inexperienced actors tasked with telling a story, it became clear to me after watching Megalopolis that even Adam Driver couldn’t save himself from reciting Shakespeare while spazzing out as if he were a marionette controlled by a puppeteer with a photic sneeze reflex who glanced directly into the studio lights before Coppola yelled “action.” 

A-List Actors And A Straight-To-DVD Plot

Megalopolis Shia LaBeouf

Set in New Rome, an alternate version of New York City, Driver’s Cesar Catilina is a brilliant but troubled Nobel Prize-winning architect and chairman of the Design Authority in New Rome who possesses an idealistic blueprint for a utopia known as Megalopolis. He also has the power to stop and start time on a whim, which allows him to think about how he’ll execute his grandiose plans under the radar. Cesar’s intellectual and metaphysical gifts are hindered by his severe alcoholism, which started to spiral years earlier when his wife mysteriously vanished and he was unsuccessfully tried for her murder. 

Cesar’s idealistic opportunism is accompanied and antagonized by conservative mayor of New Rome Franklyn Cicero (Giancarlo Esposito), his directionless yet opportunistic cousin Clodio Pulcher (Shia LaBeouf), his exceedingly wealthy uncle Hamilton Crassus III (John Voight), and his now ex-lover, a TV personality named Wow Platinum (Aubrey Plaza). 

When Cesar suddenly and inexplicably loses his gift of time manipulation, he forms a romantic bond with Julia Cicero, Franklyn’s daughter, after realizing that her muse-like presence restores his artistic and time manipulation abilities, much to the dissatisfaction of her father. 

Bones With No Meat

Megalopolis John Voight

The general plotline to Megalopolis makes for a compelling futuristic melodrama, but it all starts to fall apart when every sliding puzzle piece fails to connect. While there’s no lack of extravagant stylistic choices on Coppola’s part to make postmodern America resemble the collapse of the Roman Empire, which was at its height of excess and disorder before hitting a breaking point and falling apart entirely, style alone can’t tell a story no matter how pretty it may be to look at. 

Instead, Megalopolis renders these cinematic bones down into a slurry that the viewer can attempt to digest while they’re assaulted with vibrant colors, allegedly deceptive Vestal Virgins, sprawling city-scapes, a proletariat population in a perpetual state of civil and economic unrest, and John Voight pretending the crossbow buried beneath his bedsheets is actually an erection in order to exact a revenge plot against his nephew, Clodio, who conspires with Wow Platinum to take over his bank. 

A Cinematic Spectacle

megalopolis

Megalopolis’ godlike, time-manipulating, idealistic yet psychologically unraveling protagonist mirrors the same character archetypes that you’d see in Neil Breen films like Double Down, I Am Here… Now, Pass Thru, and Fateful Findings, to name a few. And I assure you that the irony is not lost on me that Neil Breen was able to personally finance his own projects through fundraising and his own personal fortune that he accumulated through a successful career in architecture. 

In my mind, Coppola’s fearless creation of Megalopolis deserves a considerable amount of respect because he had a vision, stuck to his guns, and did the thing the way he wanted to do it. The jury may be out on whether the thing in question is worth your time, but if you have a penchant for B, C, D, and Z-level movies, you owe it to yourself to see how even the most decorated filmmakers can swing and miss without somebody challenging their vision along the way. 

As of this writing, you can watch Megalopolis on-demand through Amazon Prime Video, Google Play, and Fandango at Home. 



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